*hacks up something vile*
Try and guess what it is before you look under the cut. Me, I think it's hilarious. YMMV.
( come on, give it one more try before you click for the answer )
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The old joke about “drowning when you snort it” would be kinda tired, but I’ve got a set of friends led by torin3 and The Chef who somehow manage to get me to hork something through my sinuses at least once a year, so it’s not so much a joke as a reminder. The last thing I snorted was wasabi, IIRC. Now that was an experience – but that wasn’t where I was going at all.( a little prelude for the confused )
So I looked at the bottle. Damn, it’s been a long time since I saw a returnable bottle, all rough where the bottles rub up against each other. Ah, memories. Ah, nostalgia.
Wait. Coca-Cola Mexíco doesn’t use returnables. Uh oh.
So I looked at the receipt. It rang up as “BUENO COCO COLO.” That sounds like a festive umbrella rum drink. I don’t think my caveat emptor radar had warmed up to the stupid level while I was in that store. Damn, I got fake bootleg Coke.
Holy crap, what’s the world come to when you can’t trust bootleggers anymore? Didn’t they unionize or something when the Volstead Act was repealed? What happened to honor among thieves, or the “pirates’ code,” as revealed in the documentary series Pirates of the Caribbean? Man, I bet I can’t even trust what the chip in my head tells me anymore.
 “but I drink plenty of … malk? (Now with Vitamin R!)” Bart Simpson, “The PTA Disbands”
 “I don't get it. Everyone loves rats, but they don’t want to drink the rats’ milk?” Fat Tony, “Mayored to the Mob”
( Super Stupid Pie )I think I horrified the crap out of bronx_baroness with my idea of "pah." You can make a hundred variations with endless choices of puddings and even cookie crusts. You can get all fancy by making the crust and filling from scratch, with real whipped cream and all, but I wouldn't waste my time. Somebody's just gonna scarf the damn thing up in less time it took to make it, and it doesn't matter what nice dishes you use, you're still gonna be the one who has to wash the fuckers at the end of the day. At least my pie takes only 20 minutes, and you can do it in your sleep if you're on Ambien.