ladycaviar | screw you, Stan Lee

Saw Iron Man tonight. I really liked it as a movie, seriously. Except for the same reason I hate most movies.

Where is a female role I can sink my teeth into? Ok, so I get that Stan Lee likes redheads. But why do his women stand around, long-suffering, and wring their hands, helpless? I could scream. The last woman I liked was Julie Newmar's Catwoman -- and even then, she pissed me off.

Why is it that strong women throughout history either are considered ball-busting bitches, or end up somehow horribly humiliated, or have to stay virgins all their lives, or are treated like they're stupid or crazy or ineffective? Oh fuck that. Where are my role models? Where are my conquerors? Do I have to be the first? Goddammit.

The only character I actually identified with was the government agent. Now there's a dude I liked. Yeah, just like me -- everybody underestimates us until you need us to save your fucking ass at the last minute, calmly and without the fucking drama, and please notice we blew just as much shit to hell with what we had in our pocketsess, yes....

Please feel free to list decent female characters throughout history who get ranked up there with the men. Oh, do I hear crickets? Seriously, I'll take fictional, too. Still crickets? Yeah, I thought so.

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Gwyneth Paltrow in Shakespeare in Love? Not a virgin by the time she got married, not a ball-buster, neither stupid nor crazy, possibly ineffective but no more so than any of the male characters - and it might be said she was quite effective in that she got Shakespeare to write Romeo and ~~Ethel the Pirate's Daughter~~ Juliet and inspired him to write his next great hit.

(It's on my mind since a houseguest watched it all of three days ago.....)

Wonder Woman. Always liked her. Don't think she had to stay a virgin, but I could be off in my memory of the mythology. Linda Carter rocked in that role, but I would love to see a re-make on the big screen.

Michelle Pfiefer's Catwoman wasn't too bad. Batman seemed to like her, and if they'd had the chance, I am pretty sure he woulda banged her. She would have hurt him AND made him like it.

In a literary sense, the "being alone" and "being misunderstood" is actually part of the hero's journey, regardless of sex. Usually the hero picks up some people along the way that "get" him/her, some that fall in love with them, and others that don't get it, but come along for the ride because they feel the need/desire.

I'm sure if you give me enough time, I can find some references for you...

Women in comic book movies are over rated anyway... once they got rid of spandex for the XMen, I didn't see the point of having any female characters in any comic book movie. Its not as if they can do what they're good at ~ like get the important men a beer or a bj ~ that would change the ratings too much. The entire story line with Ms. Virginal Secretary could have been dropped from Iron Man without a single thing being missed from the average audience member. You see, Hollywood is just keeping chicks out of their strongest roles because they can't solve the Madonna/Whore conundrum. What we need is a good strong movie about how slutty Jesus' mom used to get... then you'd have something to sink your teeth into...

Have to agree- this is one major reason that Megan and I were pretty much banned from youth group and church basically in high school- we had the audacity to actually ask about said female characters throughout history that were neglected to be listed-
Adam and Eve: Cain and Abel- Cain kills Abel
Adam and Eve: Cain....... where exactly did everyone else come from? Question was not appreciated. Go figure.

Hermione Granger and Ginny Weasley. Elizabeth Swann. Electra. Macha. Bridget. The Morrigan. Meadhbh. Boudicca. And...Xena the freakin' Warrior Princess. Need more?

-KHurley

Thanks, I feel better. Strangely, Hermione was the one that did it...

screw you, Stan Lee

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