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torin3 had to take the laptop away from the cat. As the cat was using it to send email at the time, the cat was understandably pissed.
I shit you not.
I am either the proud owner or am pwned by a 19 year old purebred sealpoint Siamese male. His name, for some inexplicable reason, is Zonker. I did not name him. I came into his life when he was 16, and he was wearing a cone so he did not bite off any more of his fur. He had scabs, and was threadbare, and looked like the Velveteen Rabbit at best. Furniture and carpets were Scary To Him. He yelled at lot. His male owner, who used to share tuna sandwiches with him once, now wanted to put him down because he was tired of hearing the noise. [Dude. He's a fucking Siamese cat. Did you not notice in the past 16 years?] This attitude pissed me the fuck off. I am not of the opinion that it is ok to kill family members because they are old and burdensome or whiny. [Good damn thing too.... but that's a different post....]
So I hid the cat in my room. He lived under my bed for a while, and then he lived in my bed. I couldn't decide if I had a teenage Asian boy who wore nothing but a fur coat sleeping with me, or a million year old geezer who demanded my attention constantly. Oh hell, why choose. I have it all! Although the Asian boy is a eunuch. Besides, how many people can have fun patting their cat and watching dust clouds come off him? Gradually, he grew back his fur and started looking like a cat. I kept telling him he was a Thai Emperor. He liked that. He would tell me that Zonker was not his name, he had a long Thai name of Much Elegance. Never have figured it out.thorae decided his hip-hop name was Zonkmaster Z. Most people call him Zonkers, like Screaming Yellow Zonkers, the snack food. He can even yell my name: Ro, Ro-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-0. Freaky. If I ask him if he wants his pill, he says, No very clearly. When he says Yeah, he sounds just like Edward G. Robinson. It's verrah funny. Oh wait, I can't laugh, he gets mad at me. Sorry, Z.
He likes the echo in the hall.torin3 says that every now and then Zonker will do sonic combat with aliens from another dimension in the sound chamber that is his hallway. Zonker says do you see any transdimensional aliens? Do you? Then my work here is done, mere human, and galumphs arthritically off.
The Chef made the mistake of feeding him dark chicken once, and now she calls him her Fuzzy Lord and Master. Sandy now brings him bacon and dark meat chicken (not white! horror!) and tuna juice and the other treats that the Emperor demands of His Chef. Zonker occasionally remindstorin3 that he has stolen his woman.
So I had left the laptop downloading some enormous update files whilst I went off frolicking to physical therapy, and when I came back, feeling as if I had been run over by a steamroller and then reassembled on a rack, the laptop had been moved to a much safer place than the center of the bed where I had left it. I assumedtorin3 had moved it either because he was safety-conscious, which I appreciated, or it was overheating, either way, he's a damn good apprentice. Keeps me from blowing myself up with the torches and such--you know, turns off the acetylene, blows out the pilot lights when I need it, stands there with the baseball bat when I'm fixing to put my hands on 220 lines just in case I seize and can't release, that kind of thing--we watch out for each other, and I was glad he had my back.
So I went to check on my downloads, and I find some weird partial emails had been sent. Um, ok, I don't remember doing that. Weirder things have happened with my email, though, so whatever. I restart the downloads that didn't go through, and start going through my morass of emails. Zonker chooses that moment to start walking on the keyboard. Wait, no, baby, don't--not there--don't hit..... SEND... shit. And the cat sent a bunch of mostly finished emails. Uh crap. [So to those of you who received some inexplicably abrupt emails, uh, the cat did it.]
And then he neatly flicked off my G key with one nail and laid down.
Later,torin3 told me why he had moved the laptop. Zonker is watching me right now. In fact, he has always watched me type on laptops in bed late at night. I wonder what else he's figured out. I don't think he much cares for how the cell phone takes my time away from him, either....
torin3 had to take the laptop away from the cat. As the cat was using it to send email at the time, the cat was understandably pissed.I shit you not.
I am either the proud owner or am pwned by a 19 year old purebred sealpoint Siamese male. His name, for some inexplicable reason, is Zonker. I did not name him. I came into his life when he was 16, and he was wearing a cone so he did not bite off any more of his fur. He had scabs, and was threadbare, and looked like the Velveteen Rabbit at best. Furniture and carpets were Scary To Him. He yelled at lot. His male owner, who used to share tuna sandwiches with him once, now wanted to put him down because he was tired of hearing the noise. [Dude. He's a fucking Siamese cat. Did you not notice in the past 16 years?] This attitude pissed me the fuck off. I am not of the opinion that it is ok to kill family members because they are old and burdensome or whiny. [Good damn thing too.... but that's a different post....]
So I hid the cat in my room. He lived under my bed for a while, and then he lived in my bed. I couldn't decide if I had a teenage Asian boy who wore nothing but a fur coat sleeping with me, or a million year old geezer who demanded my attention constantly. Oh hell, why choose. I have it all! Although the Asian boy is a eunuch. Besides, how many people can have fun patting their cat and watching dust clouds come off him? Gradually, he grew back his fur and started looking like a cat. I kept telling him he was a Thai Emperor. He liked that. He would tell me that Zonker was not his name, he had a long Thai name of Much Elegance. Never have figured it out.
thorae decided his hip-hop name was Zonkmaster Z. Most people call him Zonkers, like Screaming Yellow Zonkers, the snack food. He can even yell my name: Ro, Ro-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-0. Freaky. If I ask him if he wants his pill, he says, No very clearly. When he says Yeah, he sounds just like Edward G. Robinson. It's verrah funny. Oh wait, I can't laugh, he gets mad at me. Sorry, Z.He likes the echo in the hall.
torin3 says that every now and then Zonker will do sonic combat with aliens from another dimension in the sound chamber that is his hallway. Zonker says do you see any transdimensional aliens? Do you? Then my work here is done, mere human, and galumphs arthritically off.The Chef made the mistake of feeding him dark chicken once, and now she calls him her Fuzzy Lord and Master. Sandy now brings him bacon and dark meat chicken (not white! horror!) and tuna juice and the other treats that the Emperor demands of His Chef. Zonker occasionally reminds
torin3 that he has stolen his woman.So I had left the laptop downloading some enormous update files whilst I went off frolicking to physical therapy, and when I came back, feeling as if I had been run over by a steamroller and then reassembled on a rack, the laptop had been moved to a much safer place than the center of the bed where I had left it. I assumed
torin3 had moved it either because he was safety-conscious, which I appreciated, or it was overheating, either way, he's a damn good apprentice. Keeps me from blowing myself up with the torches and such--you know, turns off the acetylene, blows out the pilot lights when I need it, stands there with the baseball bat when I'm fixing to put my hands on 220 lines just in case I seize and can't release, that kind of thing--we watch out for each other, and I was glad he had my back.So I went to check on my downloads, and I find some weird partial emails had been sent. Um, ok, I don't remember doing that. Weirder things have happened with my email, though, so whatever. I restart the downloads that didn't go through, and start going through my morass of emails. Zonker chooses that moment to start walking on the keyboard. Wait, no, baby, don't--not there--don't hit..... SEND... shit. And the cat sent a bunch of mostly finished emails. Uh crap. [So to those of you who received some inexplicably abrupt emails, uh, the cat did it.]
And then he neatly flicked off my G key with one nail and laid down.
Later,
torin3 told me why he had moved the laptop. Zonker is watching me right now. In fact, he has always watched me type on laptops in bed late at night. I wonder what else he's figured out. I don't think he much cares for how the cell phone takes my time away from him, either....
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no subject
Date: 2007-08-16 05:03 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-16 06:22 am (UTC)Everybody give me a good James Brown Heh now!
no subject
Date: 2007-08-16 02:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-16 06:13 pm (UTC)I've told
no subject
Date: 2007-08-16 09:24 pm (UTC)Email? This is me not being surprised. There's a reason I'm very careful and possessive of my keyboard when the cats are around.
no subject
Date: 2007-08-16 11:03 pm (UTC)Glad you're back, hon. Missed you loads.
no subject
Date: 2007-08-17 07:03 pm (UTC)Just remember the siamese cat is supposedly the last incarnation before they start playing at figuring out the karma as a human. So he wants to learn all the techno stuff NOWWWWW before he comes back again.
no subject
Date: 2009-04-25 10:50 pm (UTC)This is what we use on Hotel California to tell if the shit be hot. I have gone 1400+ days without a time loss incident.
You can get them at Home Despot ect. for about $20.